Tsinito (Part 1)

By: Wei

I'm Wei, galing ako sa isang Chinese family sa Philippines but we were brought up in a Filipino culture and tradition already. Unlike my relatives and cousins who are explicitly Chinese looking, ako yong may Filipino features. I'm tall, moreno, balbasin, but nakuha ko yong katawan ng mga Chinese na lean but formed. That's why every time I travel in other Asian countries, palagi akong napagkakamalang Malay-Chinese.

After working for several years in the Philippines since I graduated college, I received an offer to work in one of the First-World Countries, Singapore. Maganda ang buhay dito, walang crimes, pollution, corruption, good wage and most of the people are law-abiding citizens because of the strict implementation of their laws and policies.

Every weekend or free time, most of the Filipinos will go to a certain place in Singapore to hang-out and remit their earnings back home. Dito makikita ang iba't ibang mga Filipino from different field of work and even mga turista lang.

I was chilling in a bench near to that famous Filipino Mall when someone sat beside me. Nong akmang uupo na siya, I stared at his face and I knew during that moment, I like him already. He smiled at me and I returned the gesture. Iba yong aura ng mukha niya, he looks clean and smart. Tama lang ang height niya, TSINITO, naka-braces pero moreno rin tulad ko. He was wearing a corporate attire, yong naka long-sleeves tucked into his trousers with his elegant pair of shoes. So I thought he is the typical Singaporean or Chinese guys na napa-halo lang sa tambayan ng mga Pinoy but all of a sudden bigla niya akong tinanong na "Kumusta?".

I turned my face rightward to look at him and said, "I'm fine, just chilling around. Filipino ka pala?".

He smiled at its sweetest, yong lalong lumiit ang kanyang mga mata, showing his braced teeth.

"Oo naman! Filipino ako.", he answered.

"Akala ko kasi Singaporean ka, kasi TSINITO ka".

"May Singaporean bang TSINITO pero moreno tulad ko?", natatawa niyang sagot.

"Malay ko!", I threw back and smiled too.

"Galing ka ata sa work.", to break the berth of silence.

"Naghahanap nga ng work eh.", as he raised his shoulders.

Sa isip ko, "Ah kaya pala naka-formal attire to." Dito kasi sa Singapore, even if it is prohibited by our Philippine Embassy, marami pa rin ang nagbabasakaling pupunta as a tourist then look for a job. When they found an employer already, pwede na silang i-apply sa government for a working visa and it's still up to the goverment kung i-aapprove ba ang kanilang employment application or not. Kung hindi, balik Pinas.

"But I already worked here in Singapore for 2 years already. Nagka-internal problem lang yong company ko that's why hindi na pwedeng i-renew ang visa ko.", he explained.

" Ah, sa anong field of work ka pala? Baka makatulong ako, I do consultation rin kasi sa mga Pinoy na naghahanap ng work dito. I took an exam before under Singapore government so I learned their employment act and government laws na rin.", I explained to him.

" I'm a nurse. And you? Sa palagay ko nasa Para-legal or Call center ka? Kasi magaling at precise ka kung magsalita", sabi niya na may halong pangungulit. Napa-blush naman ako sa mga sinasabi nito.

" Well, malayo ang field natin. But, I'm not a lawyer nor a "call-boy", and I winked at him naughtily.

Napatawa siya ng malakas and so did I. He tapped my shoulder and said, "So ano nga ang work mo?"

"Well sabihin nalang nating nasa office lang ang work ko, but most often than not, ina-assign din ako to other countries. Pero don't worry I have a lot of nurses friends here in Singapore, I will ask them if they can refer you to their company.", which is really true naman.

Then I continued, "Pag nagkita tayo ulit, I'll let you know.", sabi ko na may halong hidden meaning,

then I grinned.

"Really? Thanks ha! Eh, paano kung hindi tayo magkita ulit?". I got you inside my pocket man!

"Eh di, leave your contact number so that I can inform you", my abrupt answer.

"That's a good idea bro!", at inakbayan niya ako as a sign of thanksgiving. I felt so excited that time kasi this means that, hindi lang hanggang dito ang usapan namin.

When we exchanged our numbers already, tsaka ko na tinanong ang pangalan niya.

"I'm Kimm, double MM, hahah. 25 na ako.", sagot niya.

"Ako naman si Wei, W-E-I, pronounced as "WEY" in Chinese. Same 25 rin."

Nalaman ko kay Kimm na galing din pala siya sa isang Chinese family sa Pinas, which we found it in common between us. After an hour of chitchat with this then-stranger, who's now my friend already, I can't keep myself from admiring him. Aside from his TSINITO looks na isa sa weaknesses ko talaga, he really sounds like an intellectual man. He is not just an ordinary nurse but he knows much about life too. Which ito talaga yong first criteria ko sa isang babae o lalaki, Smart!

After that day, wala na akong na-receive na text from him. I didn't even want to contact him first, kasi ako yong tao na kung nagka-gusto, I keep my feelings discreetly. I don't even want to show gestures like a whore or slut. I asked my friends for possible job opening but wala raw muna during that time.

I thought, baka hanggan doon lang talaga ang friendship namin, which made me feel sad.

Until one day, bigla siyang nagtext sa akin. "Bro, I need to go back to Philippines na. Pa-expire na yong stay ko dito sa Singapore. Wala pa rin bang balita sa mga friends mong nurses? Baka naman maihabol pa ang application ko ;(".

I felt so sad with his news. Kung kailan nakahanap ako ng "ideal friend" in this foreign land, tsaka naman uuwi ng Pinas. That feeling, that I really wanted to console him or simply cuddle  at his back. Hindi ko ma-imagine yong malungkot niyang mukha, because the whole time that we spoke then, he was so pleasant.

I replied, "Bro don't lose hope. Sorry if I wasn't able to update you, I just don't want to disappoint you kung hindi naman positive ang maibabalita ko. So far, wala pa raw eh. Pero, I suggest huwag kang umuwi muna ng Pinas, you can still extend your stay here in Singapore through exiting to other neighboring countries like Malaysia and Indonesia. But I suggest mas magandang mag-exit doon sa Thailand or Vietnam, kasi pagbalik mo dito sa Singapore, mas mataas ang chance na bibigyan ka ulit ng immigration ng another 30 days to stay here in Singapore, which you can use that to continue your job hunting."

After few minutes, he called me! Finally, I could hear his voice again. I didn't know kung bakit ganito nalang ako ka-attracted sa taong ito, but whatever the reason is, all I know is I like him so much. When we spoke, I just closed my eyes and imagined his face right before me. His cute little eyes, his braces and his voice soothed to my ears. Yong para kang tanga na napapangiti ka nalang habang ninanamnam mo ang init ng kanyang boses. He was so happy when he conversed to me, nagpapasalamat siya sa advice na binigay ko sa kanya. All I hoped that time na maging successful ang pag-exit niya sa ibang bansa at safe siyang makabalik dito sa Singapore.

After a week, muli akong bumalik sa Filipino mall para magpalamig at kumain ng lutong Pinoy after a long day of work. Nong pauwi na ako at pababa ng escalator, may napansin akong isang lalaking nakatitig sa akin na sakay sa katabing escalator na pataas. It was strange but I stared at him too. Yong pababa ka at pataas naman siya, but you keep on staring with each other without hesitation kung ano man ang sasabihin ng mga tao sa paligid. Until, I realized... He is KIMM! Parang tumalon ang puso ko sa tuwa!

Nasa magkabilang dulo na kami ng escalator when he shouted, "I'm back! Text kita!" Lumingon ang mga tao sa kanya, but deadma lang si Kimm. Then, bumaling naman ang tingin ng mga tao sa akin, but I also ignored them, instead I made a hand gesture to phone him.

When I alighted at the ground floor, I rushed to call him and he immediately picked my ring up. It seemed that he was really expecting my call that moment while I was at the bottom and he's

at the top... floor.

"Sorry talaga bro, hindi kita nakilala, umitim ka ata, haha!", I giggled.

"Haha! Oo nga, I'll tell you the whole story tomorrow. Just text me your office address, I'll gonna visit you or I'll fetch you right after your work".

I just smiled then said, "Sure! See you tomorrow". Nothing could describe my emotions that time. Basta ang alam ko lang, kinilig ako sa moment na yon.

It was late afternoon nong natanggap ko ang text ni Kimm na nasa lobby na siya ng company namin. I gave him my floor and office's unit number. When he arrived, I let him sat beside my table. Then I said, "Hey Mr. Sun-kissed skin, how are you? What happened to you?", pabiro kong sabi sa kanya.

"Nagtanong ka pa, eh sinunod ko lang naman ang advice mo. Eh di, nagpunta ako ng Phuket, Thailand! Nag-beach, wakeboarding, parasailing, diving, kaya umitim lang naman ako ng ganito.", he laughed.

"Wow! Ikaw na! That's good at nagbakasyon grande ka pala to the max! Di mo man lang ako ininvite, hahah!", biro ko.

"Alam ko kasing, busy ka rin sa work mo. Ayaw ko ring abalahin ka pa. Ito nga yong mga pictures ko oh!" He got his iphone and showed his escapade pictures. He was then at the beach and he was just wearing a skimpy summer shorts which revealed his lean and sexy body. Napa-smile nalang ako habang tinititigan ko ang kanyang katawan, he is so gorgeous! Siya yong tipo kong, lean and formed bodied guy. Yong natural looking lang, kahit hindi bakat sa gym, pero my libog ang katawan. Aside from working as a nurse, he used to be a freelance print model din kasi dito sa Singapore, mukha rin kasi siyang Singaporean dahil sa TSINITO niyang mga mata.

"Nag-eenjoy ka ata sa pictures ko.", bigla niyang sabi while I was browsing his photos. Hindi ako nakasagot agad, gusto ko sanang sabihin na, "Nag-eenjoy ako sa katawan mo. " Natawa nalang ako at napatitig siya sa akin na parang nagtatanong kung bakit, tsaka sabi ko nalang, "Na-inggit lang ako sa adventure mo sa Thailand".

Ngumiti lang siya at binalik ko sa kanya ang iphone. "By the way, salamat talaga Wei, napaka-effective ng advice mo sa akin. Look at me now, I'm back in Singapore! At binigyan ako ng immigration ng another 30 days!", masaya niyang balita sa akin.

"Congrats bro!", sabay pisil ng kanyang kamay na nakapatong sa aking table. "I'm so happy for you!"

"And, hindi lang yan good news ko. Kasi when I arrived from Thailand, may tumawag sa aking employer and they hired me right away on that same day! And just yesterday, when we bumped each

other sa mall, tinawagan ako ng employer ko na approve na ang working visa ko! Wohoo!!!"

"Wowww!!! Congrats talaga! I'm so happy for you! So this means a celebration, right?!"

"Why not!!!", sabay pisil niya sa cheeks ko. Napabilog ang mga mata ko sa ginawa niya at napangiti nalang.

Pumunta kami sa sikat na party place dito sa Singapore, ang Clarke Quay. Literally, may river sa

lugar na to where most of the people just hang-out at the bridge or at the bars and restaurants alongside of the river. Dito mo makikita ang iba't-ibang races and nationalities, at syempre mga Pinoy din na ang pakay lang ay mag-party!

We settled at a bar, where most of the customers were Caucasians and sa tingin ko, kami lang dalawa ni Kimm ang mga Pinoy that night. We ordered a Tequila Sunrise which costs $250 or P6000 per bottle of the tequila. Pareho nalang kaming napalunok at napatawa ng nalaman namin ang presyo. Masakit man sa bulsa, but nothing could stop us in celebrating Kimm's success!

1st shot, 2nd shot, 3rd shot, 4th shot, Cheers! 5th shot... Until we forgot the numbers at malapit na pala naming maubos ang isang bote ng tequila. Umiikot na yong paningin ko at ganun din si Kimm. Since may live band inside the bar which plays mainstream music, sumasayaw na pala kaming dalawa kahit pasuraysuray na.

While dancing bigla nalang na out of balance si Kimm, buti nalang at nahila ko siya kaagad. Pero di ko na binitawan ang pagkakahawak sa kanyang kanang balikat. Instead, ipinatong ko na rin ang kaliwa kong kamay on his left shoulder. Walang sinyales na naiilang siya sa ginagawa ko, in fact tinitigan lang niya ako at ngumiti ng napakatamis. Dahil nakainom na, I felt horny with this beautiful man in front of me. Gusto kong ilapit ang aking mukha sa kanya at dahan-dahang halikan ang kanyang labi. When I was about to make the first move, nako tsaka naman siya... naduduwal! Bad trip! Bigla siyang tumakbo papuntang toilet and I followed him baka magkalat pa.

Suka ng suka si Kimm sa bowl while I was rubbing his back. Nang mahimasmasan na siya, ako naman yong sumuka. Hahah! Nagkatawanan nalang kami pareho at lumabas na ng bar at around 4am. Sumakay kami ng taxi at magkatabi sa backseat. He suddenly leaned his head into my shoulder at napabuntong hininga nalang ako while listening to the beat of my heart, like a drum, like a drum. Naaamoy ko ang scent ng kanyang buhok. While smelling his phermones, bigla niyang iniba ang position ng kanyang ulo paharap sa balikat ko. Isinubsub niya ang kanyang mukha sa aking leeg like a baby. Ngayon, nararamdaman ko na ang init ng kanyang hininga. Itinaas ko ang aking kamay and caressed his head, shoulders and back. I told to myself, there's more to this friendship than lust. And I'll be patient to discover it.

Una siyang bumaba in front of his condo, at nauwi narin ako. Paghiga ko sa kama, nag-vibrate yong phone ko. Si Kimm pala nagtext, "We are just starting... Until next time... Thanks Wei;)". Abot tenga yong ngiti ko matapos mabasa ang kanyang message. I squeezed my fave pillow, hugged and fallen asleep while thinking of him.

Simula nang gabing yon, palagi na kaming nagkikita ni Kimm. During weekdays, sometimes sabay kaming mag-dinner together kung hindi siya masyadong busy sa hospital. Sometimes, bigla nalang siyang pupunta sa aking office at mang-aalok ng gala. But ang palaging consistent sa aming activities ay ang pagba-bar naming every weekends sa Clarke Quay. Mas stressful kasi ang work niya kaysa sa akin so I understand that he needs to distress himself by the end of the week, which gusto ko rin naman. Usually before we go inside to our favorite bar, tumatambay muna kami sa bridge, uupo sa pavement, hanging and swinging our legs while we are talking, puffing and drinking our favourite heineken, wala kasing redhorse dito. Kung medyo tipsy na, tsaka kami pupunta ng bar to dance and party all night long.

Sa tuwing sumasayaw kami, dito ko lang nanaramdaman ang hindi ko ma-explain na relationship naming dalawa. Dito ko lang, nararamdaman ang aming language of sex and intimacy. Sa tuwing sumasayaw kami pareho, umaakbay siya sa akin, I caress his body, we are just returning each other's favor, at ito yong "sex" naming dalawa. I don't know whether he is straight or bisexual, but most often than not, he talks about girls. But when we go out together and may girls na nagfi-flirt sa kanya, I always give a distance pero siya yong umaayaw sa kanila, kusa niya akong nilalapitan or tinatawag to get closer to him again.

We don't text often, walang "Good morning", "Good night", "How are you?", "Did you eat already?", "How's your day?", etc. Pero kahit wala yon, nararamdaman ko siya at nararamdaman ko ring iniisip niya ako. There was a time that I terribly missed him without telling him, but then bigla nalang siyang tumawag at nangumusta. Ito yong linggwahe namin, iba sa iba. Sa tagal na naming magkasama dito sa Singapore (but we leave in separate condos), we never talked about sexuality, sex, even his or my personal relationship because we both feel that this is our "relationship". Probably he knows about me, and hindi siya manhid not to feel how I value him in my life.

There were times na siya na mismo ang nagpaparinig or nagpapakita sa akin ng motibo. There was a time that we hang out and all of a sudden, he told me that he is horny. I said, "Fuck up bro, nakainom ka lang". He replied, "Do you wanna eat me?". I just answered, "Malandi! hahah!". Sa aming dalawa, ako yong taga dala ng cigarette, so everytime na hihingi siya sa akin ng stick, he always search it inside my pocket. What he always do, kung kakapkapan niya ako, sinasadya niyang sagiin ang crotch ko and he always said, "Ops!". Tapos kinukurot ko lang yong tenga niya sabay sabing, "Naughty boy!".

Just yesterday before I wrote this story of ours, muli kaming nagkita. This time, hindi muna kami nag-clubbing, I invited him in my place. He thought na pupunta kami sa unit ko but he was surprised nung sinabi kong sa labas lang kami. I bought 1 set of heineken and 1 box of cigarette, then dinala namin doon sa tinutukoy kung lugar. Doon ko siya dinala sa favorite place ko, ang park. This is not an ordinary park, unlike sa Philippines. This natural park is situated at the heart of the city. But merong natural river, where you can feed the fish, jogging trail, bridges, trees, grass field, hills and Mcdonalds. Pero ang pinakapaborito kong part doon sa park ay ang tila small port or docking area sa gilid ng river. If you are familiar with "Tabing Ilog" show kung saan tumatambay ang mga bida, ganitong ganito talaga but you can sight the view of the city and condos nearby, kung saan ako nakatira.

Naupo kaming dalawa doon sa tabing ilog, with the beautiful scenery of the river, trees and buildings in front of us. Humiga ako sa port because it's made of wood while looking at the stars and the moon. Humiga na rin si Kimm sa tabi ko. From watching the sky, ibinaling ko ang aking ulo to look at him. Napansin niya kaya timingin rin siya sa akin. Nagsalubong ang aming mga mata. "They are twinkling", bigla kong nasabi. "My eyes?", tanong ni Kimm. I just smiled and said, "Hindi, yong stars. Ang ganda nila.", sabay tawa.

We opened the cans of beer. We talked about our respective family, work, alma matter, principles in life, experiences, lahat na, except love life and sex. I don't know kung bakit walang maglakas loob sa aming dalawa to open up these topics? Maybe because we both respect each other. Kahit ganito kami, nararamdaman namin ang happiness pag kasama namin ang isa't isa. We finished our conversation at 3am, at kami nalang dalawa ang natira sa park. But before we left the place, merong plano si Kimm na gusto niyang gawin namin in the future.

"Gusto mong pumunta ng Bali, Indonesia?"

"Of course!", mabilis kong sagot. "I love beaching too. Bali would be a great place to be."

"Punta tayo!", invitation niya sa akin.

"Sure! Pero mag ipon muna tayo. Maybe early next year. Para pagdating natin doon, party like a rockstar tayo!"

"Great idea! Sige punta tayo sa Bali next year. I'm excited what will happen there:)"

Love has different languages. Kung saan mo mas naiintindihan ito, doon ka. For sure, doon ka rin mas liligaya.

End